Thursday, November 22, 2007

肉圓超級科學教學法的廣告

之前在來去寫的, 應該是要改成中文版...

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Meatball, the best violinist (within 1cm radius from where he stands), is presenting the world the first violin teaching using real scientific method!

No feline violinist in the world has ever out-competed him. He is an outstanding performer, and kicks the asses of strayed canine violinists with ease and grace.

Meatball's new school of violin teaching is based on totally scientific-proven stuffs. It utilizes theories such as the String theory (yes, the 4 metal lines u see on the violin!), special relativity (to explain why some music sounds good to one person but sucks to another, because everything is relative!), true physics (as you see in games such as NBA 2007), and astro-physics (just in case you have a huge comet trying to hit our Earth)! With hundreds years worth of real science research behind his back, how could he be wrong?!

And that's NOT ALL!

Meatball can diagnosis all your technical problems, using techniques learned by talking to a guy for 10 mins, who once took a class from the famous Dr Henry Lee himself! And it is done using high-tech tools such as Outlook Express and Excel 2007! AND THIS IS TRUE!

And there is MORE!

Meatball watched many training videos, such as Anthony Robbins' "Unlimited Power" and "Awaken the Giant Within", and Tai-bo. He understands how to approach violin playing from both psychological and physical perspectives. He is so well versed with "Batman Training Manual" that after taking Meatball's violin lessons, YOU will be the Batman in the violin world!

And if you think that's not impressive enough, here are some recommendations from the people you (MAY) know!

"Meatball is the greatest violinist I have ever seen. He taught me all the tricks I know!" (with Italian accent)
---Paganini, Violinist/Composer

"Meatball totally blew me away!"
---Heifetz, Violinist

"There can be many emperors, but there is only 1 meatball!"
---Beethoven, Composer

"Play violin he can.."
---Yoda, Jedi Master

You are not convinced yet? Listen to what his ex-students have to say!

"He is the greatest teacher in the world"
---Izhak Perlman (no relation to the famous violinist)

"He is good!"
---David Oistrakh (again, no relation to the famous-but-now-dead Russian violinist)

"He is great!"
---Nathan Milstein (not the Milstein you think you know)

"He is like totally awesome!"
---Bart Simpson

What are you waiting for? Call now! The number is, 0800-666-6666, 0800-666-6666! The first 10 callers will receive a card with Meatball's autograph, a blank CD-R to record whatever you want to record, and a 20 mins training video on how to open and close a violin case for absolutely free!!! This free package is worth 10 dollars!

If you call today, you will get the special 10 dollar package AND 3 random mp3 files that we downloaded from a P2P network, all that for FREE!!!

All violin lessons have money-back guarantee, if you are not happy with Meatball's violin lessons, you can get 10c back! No questions asked!

Call now, bring all your money, call now! The number is, 0800-666-6666, 0800-666-6666!
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16 comments:

Mike said...

Dear Meatball 大師
我已經把全家家當都典當了
換成現金想跟您學琴
但是免付費電話打不通
難道是額滿佔線嗎?

Snowmen said...

hahaha~~~
Play violin he can~~~

:D

Meatball said...

Mike,

沒辦法, 我的免費電話系統跟高鐵售票系統同一掛的, 沒打兩三下就當機了, 請你再多試幾次吧!!!XD

Snowmen,

那是絕地大師尤達生前說的阿~~

Snowmen said...

Mike...

肉丸子又不是女生~妳打電話做什麼? XD

Snowmen said...

阿~想到了~

搞不好想換換口味... XD

owen said...

我不成了...笑死了!!! 哈哈!!!

Meatball said...

廣告打的這麼兇,也沒有什麼生意...

owen said...

換成中文會好一點吧 :p

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